March 17th, 2021 — St. Patrick’s Day! For me, this day has significance in that I am part Irish. At the very least, each year I don my favorite green items from my wardrobe, and question everyone on my path if they’re Irish, and whether they plan on a toast to Ireland with a green beer. A year ago today; however, St. Patty’s Day marked the shutting down of my Jin Shin Jyutsu practice, along with the suspension of all dance rehearsals. No green beers or celebrating. Will this be go bragh, I wondered? In old Irish, go bragh means eternity or til the end of time. We all have been in the dark, and no one knew the timeline of this pandemic. Part of me was elated that I had some time off — I’ll admit it, but after a year of this virus robbing us of our lives, livelihood, and a beer at the bar, it’s clear it’s become an act of attrition.
Without dancers in the studio with me working out new choreography, while I hang onto the barre doing my pliés, admiring their talents… I feel a big hole in my soul. My Jin Shin Jyutsu clientele at least have their Self-Help practice with me virtually, or at least some of them, but it’s the pointing of feet, the wearing of the dance clothes, the schlepping of the dance bag to the sweat-filled studio, and those beautiful, hardworking dancers that I really miss. Yes, I worked a few projects over this past year remotely, and I am so grateful and proud of my dancers and editors that helped me pull it off, as they did an incredible job, but it’s just not the same as being in a physical, somatic environment. Weh, weh, weh… cry baby, I know!
We’re all adjusting and adapting — albeit difficultly, the shutdown has given me time to reflect. I’ve been thinking about what’s really important to me. And, also examining what I can toss out, including really big decisions, such as whether or not to go back to all of it at all. Yep, that’s been on the table! I’ve read announcements of companies folding, studios shutting down, and dancers fleeing NYC altogether. Just when I was thinking, “stand clear of the closing doors, ” my Father sent me a box of 15 new dance bags with my Adams Company Dance Logo. He had no idea what I was fleshing out in my mind, but just thought it would make a nice birthday gift for me to give out to my dancers. Was it a sign, I thought? Don’t give up? Perhaps I need to step back on the train. Not sure — who knows — but, what I do know is that they’re green. And today is the perfect day to celebrate ACD’s year of floating through the pandemic, while honoring the color of this holiday. So, as I may whimper about the loss of so much, I harken back to a favorite song from the 70’s by The Five Stairsteps, “O-O-H Child.” “… things are gonna get easier… o-o-h child things are gonna get brighter.” And I’ll keep reminding myself that ” … we’ll walk in the rays of a beautiful sun… some day when the world is much brighter.” Who wants a new dance bag??